Round 4: confessions camera

[foundationmods]

This is where you can post anything your character says in the confessions camera room. The room is soundproof, and nobody on-site will be able to see or hear anything they say in there. Everyone outside of the site will see what is said, though.

We're keeping this post unlocked so everyone can see, since previous round characters will be able to see anything said here. Just remember that stuff mentioned in here won't be known to characters participating in the round unless the character tells someone about it outside of the confession room.

Comments

week 3; thursday morning

[dereban]

[ She enters, looking tired but at least she actually got some rest for once - she doesn't exactly look relaxed but she's trying not to tremble as she sits down, hands folded together on her lap.

It's not working out very well. ]

It's the third week.

Honestly, I don't know if I'll make it. This was around the time I died last time, after all.

[ Her shoulders shake ever so slightly before she hugs herself. ]

I can't deny that I'm scared. I pretend all the time that I'm not, you know? But more than that-- I'm more afraid of the others. Everyone back on Site 2, but especially Atsushi and Ichigo.

Hey, Syazel? If you're watching this? You better protect Ichigo's ass. I won't forgive you if anything happens to him, alright?!

And Atsushi. . . stay safe. Both this week and the next. I know the full moon's coming up, so please, take care of yourself. And, ah. . . [ now she looks sheepish, embarrassed even ] I don't know if you were watching on Tuesday, but I--

[ Her gaze drops, guilt wrenching in the pit of her stomach. She curls herself up into a ball so that nobody can see her cry, even if it's obvious. ]

I'm sorry. I must be hurting you so much and I'm just not thinking about your feelings at all. I bet by now, you might think that I might be some sort of huge monster. Or maybe you don't.

I'll be shocked if you don't, for all the selfish crap that I've done.

But I can't take it anymore. I don't want to die. I don't want the others to die. I don't want to kill anyone, though, just to protect the others.

It's hard for us. It's hard for me. I understand that you guys might be scared-- not knowing things? I get it. That's why I kind of snapped a little, yesterday. Back home, someone messed with me, and my friends, utilizing their power.

I was normal.

I was scared.

I still am. I can't change that about myself. But. . . I can't be this weak, not in front of them. And I hate showing that side of me to anyone. Even now.

Anyway, I think that's it for now. Please, please take care of yourself. All of you.